My 'Happy' Birthday
by Okamidemon
Summary: A few days left till your birthday... One 'should' feel excited and happy, but these annoying memories keep coming back... (Extremely short fic that was stuffed with my thoughts, feelings, and memories that hit me today... 3 more days... till my oh so 'happy' birthday...)


A/N: This is another sad fic... My birthday is three days away... I know Sabo's birthday is not son, but... it's not like anyone would want to read a fic with me as a character.

There are a lot of... pov? changes? From when Sabo was a child and then adult...

Enjoy.

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With my small hands clasped behind my back, I swayed from side to side. I looked up at my parents with a smile a adorable eyes. They smiled back at me and asked me what it was. It was almost my birthday. I rubbed that back of my puffy blonde hair and looked off to the side, "can I have a-"

.

A birthday is… the anniversary of the day on which someone was born. This 'birthday' is usually treated as a 'happy' event where people would give the birthday person gifts and love. I closed the book and slid it back into the shelf. I let out a breath and closed my tired eyes. every year I would remember back to my past. The past of when I was a child and lived under the same roof as my 'loving' parents. I brushed back my wavy blonde hair and opened my eyes. My hand stopped over my scarred left eye, "why must I remember such things…"

My birthday was soon again. The few days before a birthday are supposed to be happy, yet my few days before my birthday are horrid. They tear at my heart and mind, causing annoying pain and stupid thoughts. I grunted and walked out of the little library on the ship. I let out a huff and leaned against the wooden walls, glaring at the ceiling. The rocking ship added to my pestering memories made me nauseous.

.

"Are you asking for something?!" A face of disgust crossed my mother's face.

"You're asking us to get you something?" My father added with a even more distorted face.

"M-mn…" I nodded, my expression turning from happy to one of nervousness. I smiled even so and continued, "my birthday is soon so maybe-"

"Birthday?!" My mother snapped at me, "you asked for things on your last birthdays! You keep asking and asking. Why should we give you another present?"

I looked at my father in hopes of him saying something. He did say something, but not what I wanted… He looked off to the side, "where is Stelly?"

My eyes widened. Why are you not paying attention to me even though we are talking about something? Why am I being yelled at for wanting something for my birthday?

My mother continued her rage, "You ask too much! You don't even do anything for us in return!"

I gulped and said nothing back. I clenched my small fists at my side and shut my eyes tightly. I did do a lot… I do my best. I help out even more than that Stelly kid! Why? Why am I in trouble. Why are the days before my birthday so painful. I hate it… I hate all of this…

.

If my mind was fragile enough… I may have already committed suicide. I closed my darkened eyes as the memories continued. My heart beat slowly and painfully. I wonder why i still feel this pain. I pushed myself off of the wall and began walking towards the deck. I have everyone here, yet I can't forget those days. Even though my birthdays now are so fun and loving, I am always haunted by my past. I stared at my hand that shook. Am I scared of something?

.

My whole body shook as my small body curled up into a ball on my bed. My small hands shook as i wiped away the tears that fell from my eyes. My chest hurt so much… My head hurt so much. It was so painful…

"Why…" I cried into my hands. I closed my eyes tightly and remembered my parents faces as I asked them for a simple item. I didn't understand the meaning of a birthday anymore. I grabbed my blanket that was underneath me and pulled it up to wipe my tears. 'I ask too much,' she told me. I hugged my knees tightly. I never… I never asked much! It's almost my birthday, yet i can't wish for a present? I don't understand… Is it that… I shouldn't ask for anything at all? Mn… I understand… I can't ask at all… Nothing… I don't deserve anything.

.

It was silent like always… I hated this silence. I stopped walking and fell back to the wall again. I slid down and ended up on the ground. I laughed, "what am I doing…"

I clenched my chest and gulped, letting out a breath. It hurt so much… My chest… My head… My heart… I turned my shaking body and covered my eyes. My breath was cut up and heavy. Why am I crying… What is it that I want? I hung my head over my knees, "why…" I don't want anything… I don't want anything at all. If I ask… I'll cause trouble. I will be a burden… I took a deep breath and let out a long exhale. I leaned my head back onto the wall. Even though I'm not allowed… I want so many things… I want so much.

However… like how I was taught… I can't ask for things. Nothing at all… I don't deserve anything. Toys, books, clothes… Love… Someone like me doesn't deserve any of that...

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A/N: A short and stupid story... Sabo... I seem to have so much in common with him .


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